Friday, July 30, 2010

Confession: I am addicted to peeing on things


I'm not too proud...I can admit it...I have an addiction...and its nothing pretty either like buying shiny lip glosses, or new clothes....I am addicted to peeing on things... I like to pee on sticks-you know like ovulation predictors (OPK's) and pregnancy tests...
I know that it may be too early to test...I know what the answer is going to be ahead of time. But I just can't help myself (With the price of these things I might as well pee on a $5 bill). I think about it all day long. From the time I get up until the time I can get my hand on a pee stick.
I have peed on sticks in many different places-my house, my parents house, church retreats, public restrooms, it goes on...I have a problem..I have tried some interventional strategies...I have tried to pee on a Q-tip-but it just doesn't do it for me-it doesn't give the same high....You don't get the smiley face or lack of face...or the single pink line (I have yet to see the elusive two lines).
Which brings me to today. I tell D- "D, I really need you to buy me a pregnancy test today." He says fine. So I come home from work and they are on the table....But what does he buy....EPT. I despise EPT. God love him-he rocks my world. I would never say anything.. But we have been doing this about 3 years now...my favorite is First Response. So up to the bathroom I go. I read the instructions...(I know being the expert I am I should know the ins and outs-but I'm not familiar with this brand) Can you believe that the instructions actually say "do not put in your vagina." No, really?! Anyway, I do my thing...wait, and wait. Suprise, suprise its a negative....again. No shocker there. So I was feeling mildly depressed and decided to go to Marshalls and bought myself the beautiful shoes you see me wearing above. No baby-but I am the mother to a pair of Nude Guess Shoes.

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